Ask Me Anything (part 3)

Yet again I got such a great response and some great questions! And as always, feel free to set up an appointment to discuss any of these questions (or any other questions) further!

Question 1: Is it possible to “break” his penis? I’ve actually been asked this a few times and the answer is technically no, you can’t break it since it is not a bone. The other side of this answer is that you can definitely injure/fracture it during vigorous sexual activity. The penis fills with blood during an erection so any forceful bending of the penis can lead to serious injury. If this does happen you need to head to the nearest emergency room as it can be a very serious injury requiring immediate medical intervention.
Question 2: I never orgasm during sex? Is this normal? Yes this is very normal! Many women do not have orgasms with vaginal intercourse alone and require more clitoral stimulation. If you are still unable to orgasm there may be other issues to blame such as diabetes, cardiovascular issues, or depression, medications, relationship issues, or low self-esteem.
Question 3: I seem to “queef” a lot during sex, how can I prevent this? Simple answer is you can’t. It happens to everyone so the best method is to just laugh and move on. Don’t apologize or be embarrassed, we all make noises.
Question 4: When I climax one of my ovaries begins to hurt as soon as I get to the peak and continues to hurt for awhile afterwards… what could be causing this?Sex should never be painful but can be common due to infection, endometriosis, vulvodunia (inflammation of the vulva), and bladder inflammation. Since you are specifically asking about ovary pain I would suggest an office visit to rule out infection or an STD. This could also be a symptom of a cyst which can be determined with a vaginal ultrasound.

Question 5: I’m NEVER “in the mood”… I want to be and it is effecting my marriage but I can’t seem to want to get intimate (this has been going on for about 6 months). What can I do?  The first thing you need to know is that this is VERY common and you are certainly not alone.  Low libido can have many different causes that it may be overwhelming ranging from psychological, relational, and physical.  Since this has lasted more than a couple months I would first suggest visiting your doctor (me) to rule out any physical causes such as low estrogen or hypothyroidism.  Your doctor can also help determine if any of your current medications are behind your low libido.  Depression and anxiety are another common culprit to low sex drive and by talking to your doctor and/or a therapist you can help determine the best course of action.  Last but not least you may want to talk with a marriage counselor or at the very least do some marital work on your own.  I’ve always found that a change of scenery, good conversation, romance, a babysitter, etc can go a long way in amping up the libido.  The important thing to do is to be pro-active about finding the culprit and maintain an open and honest dialogue with your spouse!